Today, I thought I have not left. I could not. I can not. '
Thing is am I willing to. Answer is a no.
Why is it so hard.
When you have chosen while I have not.
To or not to.
That is a hard one to ponder. To decide. To realize.
Now I wish I am at a stranger's place so I would not see what is left by you.
To endure this alone...
Really wish I will find my strength and surpass you in this run.
I won't let you win...
Monday, July 12, 2010
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Two Days
Well, to be honest, it's only a day less than 24hrs you'll be up in a flight to UK. I try and is still trying to be alright from the day everything ended that both of us will be fine. The very day I am afraid to see is tomorrow where you will say your final farewell to me and let go of the very familiar hand of mine. The very familiar face I see for the last two years plus will then be in the heart for long.
I tried to write a post for you...but my hands are so stiff now and my heart is very cold. The weather today seem to know how I feel and seem to be doing real good at it. I don't know where to start. Really. So shaken with the fact that we will be literally away from each other half way around the globe; so worried of how things will eventually work out for the both of us.
For now, I can only look at the clock as it strikes 4pm, 4th July 2010 as it ticks until the very final day of tomorrow. Til then, I wish you the best.
I will always miss you and love you close to my heart.
I tried to write a post for you...but my hands are so stiff now and my heart is very cold. The weather today seem to know how I feel and seem to be doing real good at it. I don't know where to start. Really. So shaken with the fact that we will be literally away from each other half way around the globe; so worried of how things will eventually work out for the both of us.
For now, I can only look at the clock as it strikes 4pm, 4th July 2010 as it ticks until the very final day of tomorrow. Til then, I wish you the best.
I will always miss you and love you close to my heart.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Holla!
Hello peeps!
Again, sorry for the long hiatus. But worry not, I just gave a new minor face lift to the blog and hopefully, soon enough I'd be back with some outings with my girls.
Dear Kent, is leaving to UK to pursue his studies and I won't be seeing him anytime soon. Heart is pretty scattered but I guess an ending leads to a new beginning, ain't it? I am having an emotional turmoil these days..But only with challenges in life, would one gain and learn more. I believe in that. Same goes to everyone.
Alright. It's just a short update that I'm still around and til then, take care darlings!
xoxo
Again, sorry for the long hiatus. But worry not, I just gave a new minor face lift to the blog and hopefully, soon enough I'd be back with some outings with my girls.
Dear Kent, is leaving to UK to pursue his studies and I won't be seeing him anytime soon. Heart is pretty scattered but I guess an ending leads to a new beginning, ain't it? I am having an emotional turmoil these days..But only with challenges in life, would one gain and learn more. I believe in that. Same goes to everyone.
Alright. It's just a short update that I'm still around and til then, take care darlings!
xoxo
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Rains and flood
I drove out to get my dog Jacko some food and damn, the rain poured heavily and it blinded my sight the whole journey to Taipan. Poor Jacko, he was starving for few days already. He must be cursing me with his barking about me being a terrible master. Hehe.
On the way back, I noticed the cars stopped moving when the light was green. The water rise and saloon cars like mine would have to stop to see if we are able to drive across the flood. I went to the left lane considering that the other far right end are slightly lower than the left. My car went across and I thought at one moment , my car smoked! I heard some funny noises coming out from the car. I was not sure if it was from mine or was it from the other vehicles. Fortunately, my car did not die on me and I reached home safely.
Maybe I should get a bigger car to prevent this from happening. This kind of silly thoughts make me paranoid all the time and I have always wanted a BIG FOOT to drive around. You know, those that you watch in TV where they could ram over cars easily like tiny little ants being squashed. hehe.
gimme money~!
On a random note, I miss you Ting~! Come back soon so we could have loads of outings together again. =)
Ting and I
Loves,
Bie
On the way back, I noticed the cars stopped moving when the light was green. The water rise and saloon cars like mine would have to stop to see if we are able to drive across the flood. I went to the left lane considering that the other far right end are slightly lower than the left. My car went across and I thought at one moment , my car smoked! I heard some funny noises coming out from the car. I was not sure if it was from mine or was it from the other vehicles. Fortunately, my car did not die on me and I reached home safely.
Maybe I should get a bigger car to prevent this from happening. This kind of silly thoughts make me paranoid all the time and I have always wanted a BIG FOOT to drive around. You know, those that you watch in TV where they could ram over cars easily like tiny little ants being squashed. hehe.
gimme money~!
On a random note, I miss you Ting~! Come back soon so we could have loads of outings together again. =)
Ting and ILoves,
Bie
Friday, January 15, 2010
What is fair?
Sorry for my long hiatus. I've been in my own little world and it took me sometime to come out from my 'pupa' haha.
I have a question for everyone. I have been dwelling in this matter for sometime now. I could not figure it out still. hrm.. So I am asking for a favor, a little help from everyone =)
What is fair. Apakah makna keadilan. 什么是公平？
Enlighten me people. Where's justice. What sense does it make to mankind. To people like me, a girl who just wants a little fun and freedom. When freedom is a human right I believe, no one can take that away. So why am I born with ties and boundaries. I feel like I'm at the butterfly metamorphosis where I should be flying freely leaving the pupa but I am not. I am still here. Still the same. No where to go.
I have a question for everyone. I have been dwelling in this matter for sometime now. I could not figure it out still. hrm.. So I am asking for a favor, a little help from everyone =)
What is fair. Apakah makna keadilan. 什么是公平？
Enlighten me people. Where's justice. What sense does it make to mankind. To people like me, a girl who just wants a little fun and freedom. When freedom is a human right I believe, no one can take that away. So why am I born with ties and boundaries. I feel like I'm at the butterfly metamorphosis where I should be flying freely leaving the pupa but I am not. I am still here. Still the same. No where to go.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Birthday, Charity and Air Supply!!
I'm soooooooooooooooooooooo SORRY for my long absence! How is everyone! I miss everyone of you! I know i know I've not been updating my blog regularly. No worries..I'll make this quick alright?
Well well, as you all know, Sept was a perfect month for me. I loveee September for it is like a lucky month for me and I could do all I want without much trouble. ehehe..of course, I'm lucky and problem free only for this month because it is my birthday month. Most of my friends share the same birthday month as me. Hence, loads of outings and spendings. But it was good! I loved it.
My birthday went okay. I shall say thanks to all of my friends who actually came to my birthday party. I got a Braun Buffel fuschia long purse, alot of cakes, some cash from the parents, overloaded birthday wishes on FB, a red hot sling bag, few dresses from my babe and also tons of happiness =)
It was 23rd of Sept and me turning into 23 this year. HOwever, I celebrated on the 26th along with my babe, Catherine. I had dinner with my loved ones and it was fantastic!
I'll Post up some pictures later on aight. Also, apart from that..Enjoyzters and I went to Taman Megah for a charity drive. We brought in alot of stuffs but what touches our heart was their smiles and laughters. We played along with them and they were not camera shy at all. Not to mention, very talented children =) .
They surprised us with them dancing, acting, shuffling, cheerleading and also breakdancing! The kids were so adorable and they love to see us around them. SO peeps, show them some love when you could as a bit of effort brings a whole new meaning to life.
Lastly, yesterday I went up to Genting basically to watch my elder bro perform for an opening act of Air Supply's concert. It was great as the crowd did cheered and clapped for him despite it was a total different crowd. He sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow and also My Way. It was good indeed. Bravo.
Air Supply really did remind us of our older days when I was younger. They did a good job entertaining the crowd and they all went crrazy over them. Serious no joke. Haha. We came down after that and it was super late already.
Anyway I shall end this post with pics and more pics aight!
Til then, Happy Belated Mid-Autumn Festival =)
Well well, as you all know, Sept was a perfect month for me. I loveee September for it is like a lucky month for me and I could do all I want without much trouble. ehehe..of course, I'm lucky and problem free only for this month because it is my birthday month. Most of my friends share the same birthday month as me. Hence, loads of outings and spendings. But it was good! I loved it.
My birthday went okay. I shall say thanks to all of my friends who actually came to my birthday party. I got a Braun Buffel fuschia long purse, alot of cakes, some cash from the parents, overloaded birthday wishes on FB, a red hot sling bag, few dresses from my babe and also tons of happiness =)
It was 23rd of Sept and me turning into 23 this year. HOwever, I celebrated on the 26th along with my babe, Catherine. I had dinner with my loved ones and it was fantastic!
I'll Post up some pictures later on aight. Also, apart from that..Enjoyzters and I went to Taman Megah for a charity drive. We brought in alot of stuffs but what touches our heart was their smiles and laughters. We played along with them and they were not camera shy at all. Not to mention, very talented children =) .
They surprised us with them dancing, acting, shuffling, cheerleading and also breakdancing! The kids were so adorable and they love to see us around them. SO peeps, show them some love when you could as a bit of effort brings a whole new meaning to life.
Lastly, yesterday I went up to Genting basically to watch my elder bro perform for an opening act of Air Supply's concert. It was great as the crowd did cheered and clapped for him despite it was a total different crowd. He sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow and also My Way. It was good indeed. Bravo.
Air Supply really did remind us of our older days when I was younger. They did a good job entertaining the crowd and they all went crrazy over them. Serious no joke. Haha. We came down after that and it was super late already.
Anyway I shall end this post with pics and more pics aight!
Til then, Happy Belated Mid-Autumn Festival =)
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Privacy
When one's privacy has been invaded, you'll know when the trust is falling into pieces.
When I know you have been checking on me, I know it is when you've invaded my very little privacy.
When all you do is more than just an act, you know that we're just stuck in a series of drama
When everything is hanging on a single thread, we both should know it wont lasts and
that is when game ends and war begins.
When I know you have been checking on me, I know it is when you've invaded my very little privacy.
When all you do is more than just an act, you know that we're just stuck in a series of drama
When everything is hanging on a single thread, we both should know it wont lasts and
that is when game ends and war begins.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
灰色的天空
今天下大雨了。心请变得有点灰溜溜的。
怎么了？我只想好好地睡，好好地休息。
可是当我闭上眼的时候， 就想起了过去。
脑里，只不停的在想。 过去有好多不同的回忆， 有好坏的，有快乐也有悲伤的。
那我告诉过我自己，不要再回到过去了。怎么思念也不会再挽回了。=（
我想我已经把梦想放弃了。。
怎么了？我只想好好地睡，好好地休息。
可是当我闭上眼的时候， 就想起了过去。
脑里，只不停的在想。 过去有好多不同的回忆， 有好坏的，有快乐也有悲伤的。
那我告诉过我自己，不要再回到过去了。怎么思念也不会再挽回了。=（
我想我已经把梦想放弃了。。
Friday, July 3, 2009
Ifeel 有我林沁璇
大家好。这个7月份，记得要买Ifeel Magazine 哦！
因为有我在里面！哈哈。 作晚去买了一本来看，看起来有点胖！如果你们有见过我的话，我本人是很SLIM(anyone pls teach me, how do i write SLIM in chinese)。 啊哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈！！！！
好了， 说完了。记得去买哦！！
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Updates
好累啊！卓晚， 我和Enjoyzters朋友们去Joshua新开的ShabuShabu, Momo Paradise就在Kepong.
好可爱的一个新店。 虽然是吃Steamboat, 可是竟然有conveyorbelt!就是你们在日本餐馆能看到的movingbelt. 大家要去支持啊！
吃完了过后大家也去唱k了！ 真的好开心，应为 好久没跟朋友们见面了. 所以桌晚就很晚才会到家。 也另家人担心了， 对不起哦。
Anyway, 让我介绍你一位朋友。这是我的狗狗，Bobby。=）
Monday, June 22, 2009
我回来了！
大家好！我回来了。Sabah 是一个很美的地方。 但，好可惜哦。。没能够到外面走走。当danny, haoren, amy 和我到达Sabah的时候也已经是很晚了. 我们就住在Hotel Novotel. 那里真的很美啊。
Then, the next day, 当我们rehearsal玩了, haoren和 danny 也回到hotel里的泳池去游泳. 我没去因为没带泳衣。 就只能跟他们拍照。看看我叫他们的pose! 太好笑了！！
可爱吗？
有点gay. but they're not =)
我也不里外哦。我们才有一两个小时来rest, 他们跑去游泳。 那我呢？我也自拍了很多！
那当然也不能少了香港来的朋友们！哈哈。好人啊！不要jealous please! hoho
我和郭羡妮
曹永廉和我。我觉得他是很humble 的人。very friendly =)
美丽的胡杏儿。 看起来， 我很胖啊。 Actually, very thin adi larh...Just that she's much more taller and thinner.....
马浚伟.还不错, 能唱哦! 大家也一起到ClubDeVenice, 一个private club里唱k. 好玩好玩!
最后,group picture!
希望还有机会到Sabah跟大家见面!!
p/s: apologies if found any typo wordings. =)
Then, the next day, 当我们rehearsal玩了, haoren和 danny 也回到hotel里的泳池去游泳. 我没去因为没带泳衣。 就只能跟他们拍照。看看我叫他们的pose! 太好笑了！！
可爱吗？
有点gay. but they're not =)我也不里外哦。我们才有一两个小时来rest, 他们跑去游泳。 那我呢？我也自拍了很多！
那当然也不能少了香港来的朋友们！哈哈。好人啊！不要jealous please! hoho
我和郭羡妮
曹永廉和我。我觉得他是很humble 的人。very friendly =)
美丽的胡杏儿。 看起来， 我很胖啊。 Actually, very thin adi larh...Just that she's much more taller and thinner.....
马浚伟.还不错, 能唱哦! 大家也一起到ClubDeVenice, 一个private club里唱k. 好玩好玩!最后,group picture!
希望还有机会到Sabah跟大家见面!!p/s: apologies if found any typo wordings. =)
Friday, June 19, 2009
Flight to Sabah at 7.50pm
香港無線藝人胡杏兒郭羨妮等 在亞庇會劇迷
2009-06-12 (華僑日報)沙巴的朋友有眼福了！香港當紅藝人胡杏兒、郭羨妮、馬浚偉及曹永廉鐵定于本月十九日及廿日，在沙巴亞庇會見劇迷！
為了回饋亞庇Astro On Demand的用戶，Astro On Demand特別邀請到四位香港TVB藝人胡杏兒、郭羨妮、馬浚偉及曹永廉于本月十九日及廿日，在1 Borneo中央大廳和當地的劇迷作近距離接觸，一起玩遊戲並送出豐富的獎品，更為即將在Astro On Demand播出的劇集造勢。
除了香港藝人之外，歷屆《Astro新秀大賽》得獎者王明麗、朱浩仁（好人）、Debbie林沁琁以及Danny許佳麟也會在現場載歌載舞，讓你過一個快樂的周末。
想要獲得更好的席位，以便能近距離觀賞四位藝人的演出，沒問題！如果你是Astro On Demand玉龍配套的用戶，可于六月十八日，中午十二點起，攜帶最新的Astro月結單前往1 Borneo中央大廳的Astro On Demand攤位，換取二張Astro On Demand劇迷見面會的VIP通行證。座位有限，先到先得。
而非Astro On Demand玉龍配套的用戶不必感到失望，你只要在即日起至六月廿日，每逢周末，在1 Borneo中央大廳的Astro On Demand攤位現場簽購Astro On Demand玉龍配套，即可獲得二張Astro On Demand劇迷見面會的通行證，送完為止。
現在簽購Astro On Demand玉龍配套的用戶，即可通過Astro On Demand頻道觀賞《ID精英》，《仁心解碼》，雙親節特別──《精彩台慶回顧1988-2001》，及即將播出的《烈火雄心3》等等。
活動詳情：
六月十九日時間：8:00pm，節目：劇迷見面會，地點：亞庇1 Borneo 中央大廳 。 六月廿日時間：2:30pm，節目：歷屆新秀歌友會，地點：亞庇1 Borneo中央大廳，4:00pm：劇迷見面會，地點：亞庇1 Borneo中央大廳。
Got this info from one of the sites. So shoutout to Sabah ppl, I can't wait to see you all! =)
*hurriestopackherluggage*
Monday, June 15, 2009
New Look
Helloooo everyone! So sorry that i've been missing in action. don't worry. I'm ALIVEEE~!
I had a haircut! From bob to being able to tie up my hair...you wouldnt know what is my next changes.
Do comment =)
Good, bad or worse comments are fine as I'm loving it
Before
When i jst had my Bob
when it got longer and i redye my hair
when it grew longer, I love curling my hair like this =)
black and white self portrait with more curlsanddddddd
After
BeHOLDDDDDDDD
LOL this was taken last Sunday when i attended my friend's wedding dinner @ plaza Armada.
before makeup and hairdolove it?
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Questions
I wonder have I not done my part as a dedicated sister or a daughter. Have I not done anything they wish for. Anything from top to toe and if i'm still a failure in that, I really don't know what to do.
Have I not try to be there, a sister as listener
Have I not done all the things that you as a brother shld be doing
Have I not completed my so called task or responsibilities as an elder one to guide or help you
Or
Maybe I'm just someone who happens to be fated, turning out as your sister and u hated me from beginning.
Have I not done my part to fulfill what you want me to be
Have I not followed all the obligations that you have wanted me to do
Have I not done the best daughter role for you to be proud of
Or
Maybe in the end, I am just someone who cant be proud of who I am, but proud of who you want me to be.
I'm speechless and I'm feeling blunt
Have I not try to be there, a sister as listener
Have I not done all the things that you as a brother shld be doing
Have I not completed my so called task or responsibilities as an elder one to guide or help you
Or
Maybe I'm just someone who happens to be fated, turning out as your sister and u hated me from beginning.
Have I not done my part to fulfill what you want me to be
Have I not followed all the obligations that you have wanted me to do
Have I not done the best daughter role for you to be proud of
Or
Maybe in the end, I am just someone who cant be proud of who I am, but proud of who you want me to be.
I'm speechless and I'm feeling blunt
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wishlist
Women are demanding. Admit it, we love to splurge on things we like disregard of how much they would cost. My friends would love to get COACH totes, LV bags and branded cosmetics etc. Well, i'm one of them of course, but I 'm in loveeee with this one...
It's not a bag, a purse, blingblings, apparels or gadgets. It's non other than....
THIS
TADAAA~! She's called Babyliss Pro GT curling iron (1-1/4") ! I was watchin youtube on some beauty tutorials and it's wonderful! I'm so in love with it.
I'm so bored with my straight hair and sometimes I would love to add some fancy curls to it on different occasions. Thing is I have no idea how much it'd cost and I'm pretty broke.
Anyone like to get me this? lol or by any lil useful info about this curling iron. =) I'd appreciate alot!
loveeeeeee it to max! just click on the pic to read the link provided yeah?! feel free to let me know peeps!
p/s: I now wish my hair would grow long again so i would have nicer curls =)
It's not a bag, a purse, blingblings, apparels or gadgets. It's non other than....
THIS
TADAAA~! She's called Babyliss Pro GT curling iron (1-1/4") ! I was watchin youtube on some beauty tutorials and it's wonderful! I'm so in love with it.I'm so bored with my straight hair and sometimes I would love to add some fancy curls to it on different occasions. Thing is I have no idea how much it'd cost and I'm pretty broke.
Anyone like to get me this? lol or by any lil useful info about this curling iron. =) I'd appreciate alot!
loveeeeeee it to max! just click on the pic to read the link provided yeah?! feel free to let me know peeps!
p/s: I now wish my hair would grow long again so i would have nicer curls =)
Monday, April 20, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Uninvited. ungrateful.
Well, first do you go to someone's property without their consent? per say, someone's house when the host has no idea of you coming and you even had the guts to come for a visit. I dislike the fact that someone can be such immoral and lack of manners to 'invade' people's privacy and think it's totally fine for them. Thanks but not me.
What about when you are being kind and generous, collected all the beautiful gowns and dresses to be given away and your elderly ask you to give them to their friend's daughter since they are in need of those. And the next thing you know when they collect them, they show no sign of being grateful. Instead, they comment on the things you give and etc. So rude! FYI, my dresses and bags were all in good shape and entirely wear-able and costly.
shame on them.
I totally look down on them.
conclusion is, people should be understanding and be grateful when there are others who are willing to give and help. People should learn their manners and do what they preach as everyone's watchin!
What about when you are being kind and generous, collected all the beautiful gowns and dresses to be given away and your elderly ask you to give them to their friend's daughter since they are in need of those. And the next thing you know when they collect them, they show no sign of being grateful. Instead, they comment on the things you give and etc. So rude! FYI, my dresses and bags were all in good shape and entirely wear-able and costly.
shame on them.
I totally look down on them.
conclusion is, people should be understanding and be grateful when there are others who are willing to give and help. People should learn their manners and do what they preach as everyone's watchin!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Online Boutique
Voila~!
I've got something to say, something to share and I think it'd be good to hear from everyone =)
What do you think of me opening a new online boutique?
Please feel free to drop in =) I do need some support
I've got something to say, something to share and I think it'd be good to hear from everyone =)
What do you think of me opening a new online boutique?
Please feel free to drop in =) I do need some support
Friday, April 3, 2009
Of memories
I feel like there's a missing piece in me,
a time where lonely souls like me being weak,
when darkness fills in the night,
nothing else but just me and us.
Of happiness and sadness that spells love,
of fights and tears that spells a curse,
of loneliness and mess that spells a missing you,
of everything i asked for, only ends with tiredness.
sighs*
a time where lonely souls like me being weak,
when darkness fills in the night,
nothing else but just me and us.
Of happiness and sadness that spells love,
of fights and tears that spells a curse,
of loneliness and mess that spells a missing you,
of everything i asked for, only ends with tiredness.
sighs*
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Green & Pink
Helloo, I'm back from HK. Yes. The weather's super cold and I was freezing even when I wore 3layers of clothes most of the time. I don't know why majority says that HK is a really nice place to be when in comparison, Malaysia have cheaper food, better government in at least - Malaysian citizens do have EPF and etc, much lower expenses and so on. The only thing I liked about HK is the weather (cold is better than sticky hot humid ones) and safer environment. I don't need to worry of pickpocketers or rapist or snatch thefts here and there when I'm out at night with my mum, being the vulnerable ones. =)
I didn't really got myself anything cuz this time was much more on sight seeing and spendin on eating. I spent 2days at Shenzhen, a day at The Wonders of the World is totally a worthy place to go, you see all total 7wonders of the world, and beautiful and famous building built in miniatures there. Pleasant sight indeed. =p
Anyway, now that I am back, I found myself falling for pink. apple green was always my favourite colour. I have it as my ceiling colour, my dustbin, rug, bedsheet, everything you can find in my room is green! and I noticed i am starting to like pink as well. I just bought like two shades of pink nail polish yesterday and i bedazzled my ipod too.
Here's some pictures. =)
Maybe i should bedazzle my Sonycybershot camera (it's silver and BORING) and my Macbook too. Pink? haha.
I didn't really got myself anything cuz this time was much more on sight seeing and spendin on eating. I spent 2days at Shenzhen, a day at The Wonders of the World is totally a worthy place to go, you see all total 7wonders of the world, and beautiful and famous building built in miniatures there. Pleasant sight indeed. =p
Anyway, now that I am back, I found myself falling for pink. apple green was always my favourite colour. I have it as my ceiling colour, my dustbin, rug, bedsheet, everything you can find in my room is green! and I noticed i am starting to like pink as well. I just bought like two shades of pink nail polish yesterday and i bedazzled my ipod too.
Here's some pictures. =)
Maybe i should bedazzle my Sonycybershot camera (it's silver and BORING) and my Macbook too. Pink? haha.
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